The NOT so sunshine state

Well so sorry for the lack of posts or any other form of communication my dearest friendlings =)

Im sorry for i ahve no credit :/ well i do but only liek $1.7, and internet is also rare in this state =____= So now im on my dads mac which is utterly gay- where fb and ebuddy do not work >.< So yes, lauren is surviving without internet (Barely) One more weeks until i get home to my baby PC <3 So i thought i'd just summarise the past few days for you =) December 22: Well that wa sa VERY hectic day =D i went to chats, then city and had a shabang with friendlings, then went to the airport to few to the SUNSHINE STATE- why they call it that iahve no diea SINCE ITS BEEN RAINING EVERYDAY! but anyways I was on the plane and there were some little kids like sitting behind me crying, and while my parents and tose around me found this annoying, i found it rather enlightening... How when babies are upset- they are so brave as they can just openly share thier emotions and feelings with complete stargers where the judgement attached does nt even bother them - just so that they can getthier message across. Over time we say we " Mature" but really do we? I belive we usr become mroe immature overtime as we hide how we feel, lie, backstab, revenege, all these ways to "indirectly" show how we feel. As i was comtemplating this complex idea i stared out the window over the nights sky with the milions of lights- we created this - human kind created this. and ti was something extrodinary i was a part of. After that i was waiting in the rain for my uncle to pick us up i was bitten by two mosquitos =___= evil vampire bugs D: December 23: I went to see my dearest friend MISS YOUJEE =) i went to her house and ate kimchi and bulgogi *drools* omgomgomgogmomg it was so nice - i thitnk im becoming fatter by the minute! The HIHO off to the city we go =) we looked around shops and stuff- and i got my sexy nike high tops <3 heehee. Then we went to see MEGAMIND! i thought it would be really crap but it wasnt bad =) i laughed out loud quite a few times ^^ I also drank YOGURT GREEN TEA from HAZEL TEA SHOP! omg ive waited A WHOLE YEAR to drink that stuff nomomnonmnomn =) sooooo yummmmyy =D and we went zoom and took sticker photos like we always do =) Then i had a sleep over at youjees house liek old times <3 December 24: Breakfast- nomnomnomnom korean pancake (let the fatness begin) and youjee introduced me to the wonderful combination of YOUGURT AND CEREAL =D And like the girsl we are we went shopping AGAIN =) did some present shopping for my lovely =)then HAD NANDOS CHIPS omg soooo yummy with periperi salt ^^ omnomnomnomn. And stayed another night at youjees ^3^ December 25: CHRISTMAS DAY Well i went to my grandmothers house for christmas- kind of a dissapointing christmas, but i relaised some poeple have never had a proper christmas so i shouldnt take my chrstamas forgranted >.<. Christmas loot: $30 coles/ myer gift card $100 cash Guess handbag <3 So we ate normal christmas food- and played mahjong as usual =D but i lost heaps :/ut i dnt mind =) Decmeber 26: BOXING DAY I went shopping with my mum and brother- omg they bought so much stuff AND GUESS WHO HAD TO CARRY IT? >.< i bought.. - 4 DIVA rings - random tshirt - french connection top And yeah =) December 27: I went to see "tron" with my brother - it was ok, the main charcter was pretty hot 0___o. AND IT WAS POURING D: the i met up with youjee and went city =) and we saw a man on the bus with a budgie on hi shoulder- and we kept saring at it as it crapped on the bus seat >.< and whent he man got off he also had a goldsih in the side pokect of his backpack >< what an animal man >.< then went MAX BRENNER nomnomnomnom i had a Whipped milk choclotae frappe it was quite yummy =) like a 5 star milkshake =D then i bought HAIR DYE =D and dyed it later that night - yes lauren now had BROWN HAIR =) ( but its pretty faint and difficult to notice FML) We stayed the night at youjees aunts house where we shared a bed YES BOYS BE JEALOUS ;) December 28: We went city AGAIN and went to see "love and other drugs" OMG LIKE BOOBIES EVERYWHERE 0______o so much sex and nudity >o< and youjee and i were awkward tutleing the whole movies - but excluding the sex part it wa s good movie =D then we zoomed again - bris has some really nice machines =D Then we went home early and youjee watched gossip girl (yes she is now addicted) why i tlked to my lovely for over 3 hours =_____= in the like past few days the call durations have increased form liek 24hrs to 34hrs :/ I wasnt until then i relaised how shy i was- like i dont think my personality is particularly shy- as i can opently tlkabout dirty dtuff with complete strangers. But when it comes to expressing feelings and stuff i realised i am quite shy :3 December 29: Im sitting at my dads mac with absolutely nothign to do =( Well there has been my lfie for the past few days ><

** note: sorry for the typing errors i ceebs editing :/

Life is a betch..

Good thing i have you bby <3

Flashback

 

Time to step back

-escape-

Go back to the way things were

And just remember who you were

So many years ago...

And what you want to be now.... 

What can be changed

What cannot

That to be improved

That to stay imperfect-ious 

Find who you love

And who loves you ~ 

It all started with "Hey"

I find sometimes i just "click" with people

Where you talk for half and hour and its like you've known them for all eternity <3

There are friends that Ive only known for maybe a few months- but i truly trust them and love them. ♥.Where i can act like a complete fool around them and not feel embarrassed
♥.Where i can tell them all my secrets and not feel violated

Where after 2 days you share all your experiences/ fears and secrets

We share this special relationship this special place..
filled with:

♥.Trust
♥.Loyalty
♥.Laughs

Today my BEAUTIFUL friend Kyla wrote me a text
 ( note some private bits are blanked out)

"Hello my dearest lauren ___ aka laulee. Since you said you were writing letters for xmas i wanted to take this opportunity to tell you how much you mean to me as a friend. This year I met this girl right? She has the highest voice i have ever heard in my life, she also has a super dirty mind and stalks a lot of people, but regardless of those weired traits of her shes pretty damn great. You have such a kind and considerate heart i don't know how that works with your dirty mind but it still works. I hope after HSC we're able to catch up on you DNMs i quite enjoy them. Where we are able to vent our deepest frustrations with each other  with boys, family and work . Gotta love how our life gives us so much trouble otherwise we would not have so much stuff to talk about. im going to miss you when you go to _____  that means i wont be able to hang out with you as much. We still need to go on that date of ours we planned don't worry we can invite _____ if you really want then he can shout you everything. Time for some words of encouragement:  You are pretty and smart. Don't let anyone compromise your ethics. I appreciate  having a  friend like you who worries as much as i do about standing up for their friends. Shows how much  you care  for our friendship. Hope one day you'll find your own  real life prince charming who will treat you to what you rightfully deserve. Im happy to say that i love you lauren ____ and i mean it ;)Im glad i moved to chelt otherwise i wouldn't have ever gotten the chance to meet such wonderful people. Some things ill truly  treasure are the memories we share."

There was so much included in this paragraph
♥. Past
♥. Present
♥. Future
♥. The good
♥. the bad
♥. the funny
♥. the not-so-funny
♥. THE LOVE
 
So here i shall share some of my memorable convos =D

 I LOVE YOU CAROLYN <3
Remember the saying "Porn makes your hair grow faster?"

 LOL YASU LOVES ASSS ;)

 AHAHA pay attention tot he end...

I NEVER ASKED FOR HIS FB!

 Stupid nerdy Asian that pwns in maths.....

 MSN.. the place where cheese fails LOLOL

 NICE...... THANKS HERPES... NICE!

NGAWWSSSS Peng so clueless =)

 I NEVER said anything ;)

HEEHEE well i hope you got some laughs from those =) to tlk to me =) whether its on...
♥. MSN
♥. Facebook
♥. Text
♥. Calling
♥. Real life

Or any other form of communication =D

Because i want tot extend our friendship and add the the already massive collection of memories we share <3

Autobiography

♥ I if text you i really do care, because every text is like painnn (50 credit a YEAR!)

♥ My spelling is as bad as a 7yr olds to get used to it ( so is my grammar)

♥ When im on msn i type so fast I my messages sometimes dont make sense, and it sounds like i have a mental disability.

♥ I am told i find nearly everyone hot =___= its not my fault i see everyones attractive qualities ;)

♥ Yes i am chinese.... NO I CANNOT SPEAK CHINESE!!! NOT MANDO NOT CANTO NOTHINGGG!!!!

♥ Apparently i have a voice so high i can attract dogs...

♥ Yes is like to "facebook" people before i meet them =)

♥ Im on msn most of my life ( tlk to me im always lonely ^_^ )

♥ I find lateness quite annoying- and i like punctuality

♥ I blush ALL the time :/

♥ I like squishy people

♥ When i say you dont "have" to do something- i really want you to do it anyways >.<

♥ When i tell you not to do something don't do it.

♥ I can make dirty connotations out of everything

♥ I feel guilty very easily

♥ You love me, ill love you back ^^

1......

Today i think Ive realised im going to be lonely for a long time~ but i really don't mind =)

This afternoon i found myself downloading pointless rave music~ with pointless lyrics with no meaning accompanied my a repetitive ostinato and heavy bass :/

Barbra Streisand
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo

Barbra Streisand
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo

Barbra Streisand
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo

woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
woo woo woo woo woo woo woo
Barbra Streisand

What pointless lyrics~

but i continue to listen to this rave music...

Because i cannot stand hearing another love song :/

So i sit here in front of my monitor bopping my head up and down to the pointless melody....

Just forgetting the world.

BLACK OPS! black whaaa?

 Here are some fb group- but my little comments below`


Boy and Girl sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First came love, then came marriage. then Black Ops came out and all else was forgotten.
(It may be like that for the first few weeks , but he'll come back)


Black ops, the reason every girl will be single this summer
( Well it is holidays... and it summer- perfect weather to say home and game)

Slaying pussy this summer because you're the only guy not playing Black Ops
( BHAHAHAHAHHA )

3AM. Boyfriend sends text message to his girl: "Hey babe I know you're asleep... but I just wanted you to know... I just got the BEST killstreak in Black Ops!"
(Well its kind of sweet they want to tell you about their killstreak- sharing something important with you)

if a guy text you back during dota he loves you LOL jk, he just died
(whats wrong with that? at least hes bothered)

If a guy txts u back while playing COD, he <3 u, loljk the games just loading.
(YOU CANNOT TALK UNTIL YOU'VE SEEN PEOPLE PLAY COD, im a girl and even i can't mutitask that well, your liek constantly shooting things, changing weapons, while talking to your fellow team members and text at the same time? i think we are asking for a little too much)


"Beyonce - Halo", "Jordan Sparks - Battlefield" whats next? Rhianna - COD?
( i justed lolled ^^)

If she makes you food and watches you play COD, she really loves you.
( I make food for my brother when hes playing COD - well i serve it to him...)

romeo romeo where are thou romeo...juliet shut up he's playing COD. :/
(who says COD cant be romantic?)

*******

So today im going to discuss some games~
eg:

- DOTA

- Starcraft

- WOW

- COD 

- CS

 the list goes on....

Now to begin my analysis

THE LADIES!- answer the few questions below

1. What does "WOW" stand for? 

2. Black ops is an installment of which game? 

3. What year was black ops released? 

4. What does "CS" stand for?

5. What does "COD" stand for?

(answers at the end of blog)

So how many did you ladies get right? 

4-5 (WOW LINE UP BOYS)

2-3 (hmmm :/)

1 (......)

So now, if you didn't do so well, time to step back,  is it fair that us girls always accuse guys for "dogging us for dota" when really we know nothing about it?
 and think about this... HONESTLY- be dogg guys for stuff.... to like talk to a girl friend on the phone, paint our nails, watch a drama etc....

So how is this any different?

We should let them be who they want to be- and if they love COD we have to learn to deal with it whether that means to
- love COD too
- Learn about COD
- or simply accept it

Because they accept our interest and hobbies- as we should theirs

NOTE TO THE GUYS: Dont think we are COMPLETELY clueless  ( i wrote this blog without any assistance) and explain these things to us :) so we understand why you are dogging us ^^

But i grew up with video games- mainly watching my brother/ cousin play, so im very content with watching. But in GENERAL for the female mind finds it very boring.... so unless you know we are cool with it DONT TAKE US PC !!

Anyways happy gaming <3



ANSWERS 

1. World of Warcraft

2. COD ( call of duty)

3. 2010 ( November) 
4. Counter Strike
5. Call of duty 

Permanent Mismatch

" Why do girls keep nice guys as friends, then fall in love with some jerk? "

 The story of my life- and probably of every other girl on the globe.

There is a time in life where you meet a guy thats....
♥.sweet
♥.responsible
♥.caring
♥.gentleman-like
♥.trustworthy
♥.respectful
♥.loyal

That genuinely care about you. hence you enjoy....
♥.talking tot them
♥.spending time with them
♥.sharing secrets with them

And this then flourishes into a wonderful friendship, where you.......
♥.care about them
♥.listen to them
♥.want the best for them

and finally....
♥.love them.

But there is nothing more, just pure friendship.

And you ask your self..
if only... if only i liked him.....
we are so perfect together..
He is perfect for me...
I am perfect for him.....
I love him and he loves me....

But you know nothing mores going to happen. because you will always be
"just friends"  

Then another guy comes along.......
♥. that you hardly know
♥. has no common interests with you
♥. doesn't understand you
♥. doesn't care about you
♥. doesn't trust you

and you fall for them.... fall hard....

and you ask yourself, why?

And you cling onto these feelings until something screws up and then youre....
- upset
-crying
-depressed
-lonely

who will come pick you up? but your friend...
Your boy-friend

The guy that you should be with.... but never will be....

1...2...3... SMILE *click*

Its has occurred to me that i like to take a lot of photos, even though my camera is so dodgey, and crap :/where the photo quality is crap, and ti takes ages to process a photo.

Then you would automatically think that im into photography, but this is not the case.

Pictures are magical things, allowing you to relive and event... a moment of time. Where a million emotions can be captured in one image, where an image can tell a story or experience.

I find myself on the weekend just going through my photos looking at a random albums and reliving that day, and reminiscing about the past and what had happened. Where i smile at all the stupid things we did, and immediately filled with the warmth present when those photos were taken.

Below Im just sharing a few of my photos i really like =)

Note: None of these pictures have been photoshopped =)

They may be STARS, but they dont have HEART.

Today people from JYP (Korean recruiting agency to find potential Korean singers/dancers) were snooping around the school finding potential "stars" and convincing them to audition on Sunday.

This made me think imagine  how easy life would be if you were born..
♥. Pro Singer
♥. Pro dancer
♥. Pro Actor
♥. Extremely attractive

Your life is set our for you , thats all you have to do as a living do what you love, your talent is so obvious, and these talents can get you a stable income and fame.

No stress, just dress up and perform, everyday of your life, watch people adore you,and envy your talents.

Where does this leave me?
Me...
Sitting at home.... alone..
With a crap load of homework...
A whole lot of washing to do....
My hair a mess....
In a ugly pink uniform..
Wallet with 20cents in it....

But one thing i have, is my friends, and the fact that they are my friends even though im not any of those things listed above, but they still choose to talk to me and spent time with me.

And love me more than they could ever love a celebrity  ♥.

Sleeping

Last night i had another dream or rather ANOTHER nightmare.

Im not going to mention the exact people in the dream so i shall use fake names.

************************************************

Im walking to the station after school with my friend Amelia

Shes talking about music and the things she likes.

The she invites me to her youth on Friday

I accept the invitation, but then Amelia says:

" Oh sorry maybe you shouldn't come Terry is there and she really doesn't like you"

I kind of step back and say " WHAT? But Terry doesn't even know me, Ive only talked to her like twice"

Amelia says in a very calm tone " I'm sorry Lauren, but you have that kind of reputation everywhere"

***************************************************** 

Then I Woke up.

It took me a good hour to comprehend my dream, as i was confused it was reality.

Many people want their " dreams to come true"


However, if i keep on having dreams like this is hope they NEVER come true.

Impressions

Do you remember when people used to say

"Don't judge people before you meet them"

Now i say..

"Don't Judge people before you've read their blog"

Blogs/ tumblrs are perfect tools for procrastination :)
And they allow you into the inner thoughts of either friend or a stranger =)

Reading the inner thoughts of a person, and reading their ramblings as they pour their heart out on a web page.

Special note to: 

Bill- I love reading your tumblr everyday =) it makes my day filling me with thought  provoking questions and statements.  As i read your tumblr to know a bit more about you =)

Kyla- Your blog makes me LOL :) i find my self smiling like a retard when i read your cute/ humorous posts ^^

So read a blog it might just make your day ♥.

Got to catch them all

 

Be my Pikachu

And i will be your Ash 

We will be an unstoppable team

You and I can fight anything

Even Team rocket

I will be there to protect you

Look after you

Have fun with you

and most of all...

Love you. 

Together we will travel

Make new friends

Collect new badges

Train our Pokemon

You and I

Together

as

Best friends 

♥

Torture

I find my self wondering back onto your
- Facebook
- Blogger
- Tumblr
- Formsspring
 And the first thing i look at is your relationship status...

Why?

Probability

Today i had to wait for my mum for about an hour. So i was bored trying to do my economics homework- but with the amount of distractions around me i could not concentrate. So i took out my wallet and took out a 20 cent coin. I ran my fingers over its irregular surface, as i proceeded to flipped the coin mindlessly in the air.

Toss~
Catch....
Toss~
Catch...
Toss~
Catch....

I found my self repeating the same repetitive actions......



Toss~
Catch....
Toss~
Catch...
Toss~
Catch....


Until i began to ask myself questions in my head such as...

- If this is tails I miss ______ .
- If this is heads i was a terrible friend to _____ .
- If this is heads i should apologize to ______ .
- If this is tails i still have feelings for ______ .
- If this is heads it was mistake to reject ______.


When in my heart i knew the answers to these questions- I knew what they were, i knew the answer hidden deep down in my heart.
However When i was flipping the coin i always wanted it to be the opposite to what i felt.
Because i was as not happy with my answers i wanted to change them i wanted to change life. With some wishful thinking i though i could stupidly change it.

After my little flipping session i put the coin back into my wallet.... along with all those fake answers to my already-answered questions.

Life isn't Dependant on chance.
You cant make decisions by flipping a coin or rolling a dice.

You have to make the decision- and live with the ramifications.

Jealousy

Jealousy is an emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, such as a relationship, friendship, or love.

 I am not going to lie i get jealous all the time.
longing for another persons attributes/ appearance/ skills/ talents/ personality... and the list goes on.

But jealousy is conveyed as a negative feeling. But really when you think about it it really isn't given the next few facts.

1. Humans are selfish, it is instinct to want the best for ourselves. A friend once told me the safest place to sit in a car is behind the driver, because if the driver is about to collide into something, it is human reflect to protect themselves and move out the the past of the object, possibly putting the person in the passenger seat in danger- even if they don't mean to.  So we want the best for ourselves, however love for a person can override this, however you cannot ignore human instinct.

2. Social pressures of society are constantly pressuring us to be "perfect" or to be the "best" which is realistically unachievable- but we all strive for this common goal.  

3. Everyone is different with different attributes and talents, we live in a world where someone will always be "better than you" and you can only strive to be your best.

So given those 3 conditions how can an individual NOT become jealous?

When we all strive for perfection we don't have- as we pick out faults within ourselves, observing those who do not obtain those faults as we long to fix our faults- to be better, as we are blinded and dont see other peoples faults. So in our mind they are closer to perfect than we are, when realistically they are not.

When we have these aspirations to be another- this isnt jealousy- but admiration.

Admiration: Wonder mingled with approbation or delight; an emotion excited by a person or thing possessed of wonderful or high excellence

As we admire the illusion that they are closer to perfection than ourselves.

I like you, you smell nice :)

Everyone loves a pleasant smell =) Hence why theres a billion dollar industry producing perfumes and deodorants.

This about all the scented product sont he market these days

- Perfume / Cologne

- Deo

- Soap

- Cream

- Chapstick

- Scratch and sniff stickers

- Car fresheners

- Air fresheners

All products to make things smell better. 

There is something Ive noticed.....

Girls like guys deo

Guys like Girls deo

Crazy aye? I think it one of those " The other side of the fence is greener" Because i personally think they both smell nice =)

I tend not to notice other people smells much... except Victoria OMG SHE SMELLS NICE! ahahahaha =D

Smell you laterr ^^

Hello _______.

Recently theres something Ive noticed, that i find really touching. It may seem insignificant, but to me, i actually DO notice it and it means a lot.

It is when someone addresses you by name. Either saying hello, goodbye or anything really =)

So on msn theres a difference when someones like

"Heyy"

Vs

"Heyy Lauren :)"

1. thew smiley face is cute

2. by typing my name on the end, it shows what when they are talking about that they are really talking to me and didn't make a "mistake" and thought they were talking to someone else.

3. Honestly we are such a  lazy generation and i am touched they are bothered to type an extra 6 letters just to greet me =)

So next time don't forget the little things that can make another person happy, =)

Home Sweet home.

Today, the rain was falling around me, as the clouds covered the sky. matching my hideous mood. As i walked up the hill to school, letting all the things in the world upset me, everything from the weather to the annoyance of my old, yet reassuring school shoes. I began to avoid people i knew.friends. Just to avoid having to "pretend" everything was ok, not wanting to use the energy to smile to be happy. Everything buzzed pasted me as i felt melancholy, letting nothing effect me. Id let all the things that upset me run over and over again in my head, just so i would be more upset.

My eyes so heavy and tired, from the sleepless night before. A night filled with disturbing dreams, occurring simultaneously one after another. Then i was force to sing, something i enjoy doing, was suddenly something i hated.

I stared to the front emotion less mouthing the words, even though i knew the words, the tune, the rhythm, but i didn't even bother trying. I heard the music around me, but it sounded like white noise. Just another annoyance in my life. I was forced to mouth the words "Oh Happy day" the opposite to what i felt. Tears would fill my eyes as i would wipe them away, and blame it on my lack of sleep but i knew it wasn't that.

The day continued with much indifference, where every subject seems more boring than the next.

Until. until something changed.

Until something lifts you from that dark, dark place, where you can just slowly climb out of that ever so deep well.

So yes, i escaped that dark hole, that place of sadness, and found a new place a place with friends and love.

A place where i am determined to stay. 

Silver Lining

Sometimes it takes something absolutely awful to find out who your true friends are <3

<\3

When Life gives you lemons.

And squeezes out all the juice, and forces you to drink it till your eyes water, and your tongue stings.

When the acids is rubbed into your eyes and any open wounds.

You surround your self with friends.
Friends filled with love, sugar and water.

To make those tears go away
To make your tongue stop stinging.

To turn lemons to lemonade

To be your Saviour your AID.

To remind you, life might just be worth living.

Gossip Girl my life

I'd like to make reference to my absolutely favorite show gossip girl <3>

From this..... to....

This?

Now im not implying im like jenny humphrey =____= But this winter my wardrobe was more leaning towards that ares, with leather jackets, shorshorts and patterned stockings.

But now ts spring soon to be summer, there should be a change...
So i was much inspired by the temporary gossip girl character Eva Coupeau
With her pure innocence and optimism.

I admit she is not my favorite character since that is taken by CHUCK BASS <3 but however i DO LOVE her sense of fashion.

The pastel coloured high waisted shirts =) So i think this summer im going to go under a conversion
Get ready for Lauren in high wasted SKIRTS!

Summer a new season- new clothes <3

TIK -TOK

Time 
–noun  
the system of those sequential relations that any event has to any other, as past, present, or future; indefinite and continuous duration regarded as that in which events succeed one another.

I WAS a strong believer in age sets no limits.

Until two nights ago i had a dream.. or rather a nightmare..

Im sitting on my computer, and i look on "their" facebook profiles, an endless stream of posts form people i don't know in a  language i can not comprehend.I then proceed to "create an event" and i invite "them", only to have them comment on the page asking who i was.

I woke up after that, scared, disorientated, with what appeared to be tears in my eyes.

This could be a combination of my worry, and also for my fb deprivation ( 6 days and counting without facebook)

So maybe age does set limits, even a year or two. 

"They" have finished their HSC, relaxing and enjoying life- and i hope to join them once the summer holidays start. This is all good, but what happens when "they" join university? When they become consumed in their new lives?

Where does this leave me? still left in school, with what will probably seem like with my insignificant worries.

It is true that i have lost quite  few friends over the years, but that was due to a mutual distancing whether it was to do with physical location, interests or opinions. But what if i keep holding on to what "they" want to let go. 

Time- truly evil

I guess time will only tell what will happen.....

So i may as well as enjoy the time i have now. 

Nothing.

Disappointment... a vital part of life experienced by everyone.

There were a few things in life, some bigger than others, but they were my goal. if you don't know me well enough i tend not to set goals, because i don't know if i could bear the disappointment. Yes i am weak. 

So there a few things that Ive striven for.. the amount of effort....

And today one small disappointment made me just wan tot cry... over basically nothing.

Disappointment is one of my many evils.

So don't set goals

Dont believe

And maybe then you wont be disappointed like i was ever so many times. 

You Have One New Message

I hope you know each text you send to me means the world, 

The ones as i wakes up

The ones as i fall asleep

The ones when im happy

The ones when im sad

The ones about your life

The ones about my life

The ones that make me cry

The ones that make me smile

The ones you send when your bored

The ones you send when your busy

Just a little message so that i know you are missing me as much as im missing you   ♥.

Have credit?

Send a text to a friend ~  Be their sunshine for the day ^^

Lliteracy .

When you say words it hurts. 

When you don't say words it hurts.

When you say the wrong words it hurts.

When you say the right words it hurts.

When you say "those" words it hurts.

When you say my words it hurts.

When you say anything it hurts.

But when you say "I love you" you make me forget that I was ever hurting.

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Well recently Ive been quite into Tumblr....

 so in the future you will see a lot of my images form there ^^

Untitled.

I keep telling my self lies, and repeat and repeat them... until i forget they are lies and believe they are the truth. All to distract myself from you.

But then once i talk to you- i realised I'm living in a lie.

Just to get over you.

MY BUBBLES!

A good friend told me "Cherish your childhood" 

Then i began to reflect on my own childhood~ Like when did things get to complicated? when did we become concerned with organisation and social norms?

 The simple joys of childhood. The happiness.

So now, why be so serious all the time? This got me thinking..... I STILL love bubbles~ childish i know- but aren't we all still children at heart? Sure we put on a hard exterior and "say" we are grown up but really, we still find joy in the things that made us happy when we were young.

Now everything we do/ say/ buy - we consider the "cause" and "effect", but why? can't we do things anymore just because.... we feel like it? 

Cartoons, Toys, bubbles~ such simplistic ideas but so much carefree joy.

“Our whole life is but a greater and longer childhood”

-  Benjamin Franklin

Bubbles- just watching them float effortlessly in the air as they reflect rainbow colours- the variation in size with their glossy reflection and transparent nature~ as you see them get carried by the wind only to fall to the ground and "pop" Simplistically Stunning. 

Now time dominates lives, we forget, what used to be....

I remember when i would get so excited from Christmas- so excited that i wouldn't sleep all night ^^ to excited to sleep =D and i would get up at the first crack of dawn to open my presents and listen to Christmas carols.. Now Christmas is like a regular day no different to the next :/

So don't forget the simple pleasures in life those of ice-cream/ Disney films/ and BUBBLES!

Childhood is the most beautiful of all life's seasons

Some call it immaturity, I call it Happiness ♥.

You pretty betch :P

I'M A BITCH!

- Every girl can be a bitch.

- Every girl has a natural urge to bitch.

- Every girl has bitchy thoughts.

- Every girl can be selfish.

I'M A GOOD FRIEND!

- Every girl can become a good friend.

- Every girl ahas a normal urge to love.

- Every girl has loving thoughts. 

- Every girl can be considerate.

Now you choose your destiny~