depression.

For the past 2.5 weeks since school started Ive been feeling very depressed everyday. . . For a number of reasons.

1. My midcourse exam marks were crap =___= and i don't think my effort was rewarded
2. I didn't do enough work in the holidays
3. I have no money
4. its so cold
5. Missing youjee <3
6. Parents arent being very understanding
7. SO MUCH WORK TO DO
SO many future choices to worry about
8. the prospect of having no holidays till after HSC (nov 2nd)
9. and next week the last time ill see my love for a month (at least) :(

SO every morning im been waking up laterrr and going FUUCKKKK =___= when i realize what a crappy day its going to be :( and randomly crying when the slightest thing goes wrong.

Before i used to make my self get out of bed because i dont want to be late for school. . .  but now i dont even care anymore :(

Ive contemplated why all this crap is happening to me. . .  since 2010 was such a good year for me. . . .  and Ive thought about my actions and my sinns- think god is punishing me  . .  but i know the lord doesn't punish- but he thought is lingering.

But today i slowly crawled out of the hole - i cant say im myself again , but better slightly :) and i hope everyday i get better and better. . . . .

And thankyou to BILL ZHANG and CAROLYN LOH who have been shining rays of light in my darkest days, cheering me up <3

I love you .

Hold my hand? :)

This life don't last forever (hold my hand)
So tell me what we're waiting for (hold my hand)
We're better off being together (hold my hand)
Than being miserable alone (hold my hand)

Cause I've been there before
And you've been there before
But together we can be alright.
Cause when it gets dark and when it gets cold
We hold each other till we see the sunlight

So if you just hold my hand
Baby I promise that I'll do all I can
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
Hold my, hold my, hold my hand.

The nights are getting darker (hold my hand)
And there's no peace inside (hold my hand)
So why make our lives harder (hold my hand)
By fighting love, tonight.

Cause I've been there before
And you've been there before
But together we can be alright (alright)
Cause when it gets dark and when it gets cold
We hold each other till we see the sunlight

So if you just hold my hand
Baby I promise that I'll do all I can
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
Hold my, hold my, hold my hand.

I can tell you're tired of being lonely (yeahhh)
Take my hand don't let go baby hold me (hold mee)
Come to me and let me be your one and only (hold my haand)
So I can make it alright til' the morning (hold my hand)

I can tell you're tired of being lonely (hold my hand)
Take my hand don't let go baby hold me (hold mee)
Come to me and let me be your one and only (one and only)
So I can make it alright til' the morning (hold my hand)

Hold my hand, (yeah) baby,
I promise that I'll do all I can (hold my hand)
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
Hold my, hold my, hold my hand.

Hold my hand, (yeah) baby,
I promise that I'll do all I can (hold my hand)
Things will get better if you just hold my hand
Nothing can come between us if you just hold,
Hold my, hold my, hold my hand.